Wednesday 1 October 2008

a very long rest

As you all are aware, it can be very tiring being a cat, especially the only gay in the village! This is the only explanation I feel obliged to offer for my blog silence over the past two and a half months. I have not been doing anything particularly special, but I have just had feline writer's blog block. In addition, blind mummy has been keeping all the upstairs doors shut during the day through the summer, after a rather messy incident or two after Pixie went hunting. I will blame pixie because as the feminine gay cat that I am, I am far too flouncy to engage in such tomboyish activities as hunting and chasing mice and birds!

Anyway, the incidents to which I refer relate to pixie and I having a little feast on her roadkill presents and them not particularly agreeing with us. This led to a couple of trails of unpleasant regurgitation on both my beds in blind mummy's room and in deaf clumsy mummy's room. I don't understand why, but blind mummy was not impressed with my caring sharing intentions and has kept the doors firmly shut ever since, thus impeding my access to the computer.

However, now that the winter is well and truly on its way, hunting season is probably over for Pixie so we are given a little more lenience during the day.....at last!

Blind mummy has been away on holiday and visiting her friends recently which has meant that we have been home alone at weekends rather a lot lately. Deaf/clumsy mummy has been coming to feed us which has been nice. I have also discovered the short cut to my oscar's house (deaf/clumsy mummy also lives there too), the shortcut which blind mummy uses when she has been drinking alcohol or when it is dark. It involves cutting down the side of a house, through an access way and through a convenient hole in the fence. Really this is a route which should only be used by cats, but blind mummy says that why walk five minutes round the road when you can get home in 30 seconds by taking the short cut? The only problem is, the shortcut way has become rather a dumping ground and she has to navigate fridges, old bicycles and discarded sofas. My Oscar loved one of the sofas and used to sleep on it until someone set it on fire.....we live in a really nice neighbourhood as you can tell!

Anyway, before I close I just wanted to say a big hello to Mr Old Tarf from Canada, top cat Biggles from London, cousin Monty who has a ginger mouth and my Oscar Molly and Denny. It would be nice if there were more visitors to my blog but I am a private cat and don't like to advertise!!

Hope it is not another two and a half months before blind mummy allows me access to the computer!

Friday 11 July 2008

my little cuban friend

Blind mummy and monty's mummy have gone a bit mad! I don't know what all the fuss is about myself ut hey ho who am I to question the reasonings of human beings, I am a cat and therefore far superior!

Blind mummy and Monty's mummy who is one of the links from my page, are going to a place called Cuba in February and they are gonig to walk and walk and walk for a long time for charity. They are raising money for something called MIND which is the organ with which I velieve you think. It is SOMETHING TO DO WITH RAISING AWARENESS OF MENTAL HEALTH OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT. aNYWAY,M BLIND MUMMY IS PANICKING A LITTLE BIT OR IN HER WORDS, A BIT DAUNTED BY HAVING TO RAISE SO MUCH MONEY. sHE IS ALSO EXCITED.

i KNOW i DON'T HAVE MANY VISITORS TO MY PAGE, BUT IF YOU DO VISIT AND YOU WOULD LIKE TO SPONSOR MUMMY AND HER FRIEND WALKING ACROSS cUBA, PLEASE CHECK OUT THE ONLINE FUNDRAISING SITE.

http://www.justgiving.com/simoneygirard

i WOULD BVE EVERSO GRATEFUL AS IT WOULD SHUT MUMMY UP AND STOP HER FROM PULLING HER HAIR OUT!

maNY THANKS

Sunday 29 June 2008

ASBOs and hoodies

There are some really nasty people living in the houses behind my garden. Today, they have been shooting pellet guns at me and my sisters. I am scared! Mummy says they are ASBO hoody teenagers.


This is a picture of one of them, they don't have any faces and are really mean!


Sunday 22 June 2008

the scary intruder

It has taken me a week to get over the trauma of last Friday morning, but I now feel able to share the story with you all.

I was in a lovely deep sleepd on mummy's feet, on the blanket at the bottom of the bed when I was rudely awoken, along with mummy by a horrendous screaming and screeching from downstairs. I was very scared so hid under the bed.

Mummy went to investigate and heard noises coming from behind the glass cabinet in the living room. Pixie my sister was very interested in what was behind there. There was then a glapping noise and mummy screamed, ran out of the house in her night dress and rang other mummy to come and help. It was just after 5 30 in the morning and there was a birdy birdy in the house which was very much alive with a very long beak and was flying around and around the light like a moth.

Other mummy arrived 5 mninutes later and we all stood around in the street wondering what to do. The birdy birdy was on top of the curtain rail and pixie was going mad trying to catch it. I decided at this point, as the oldest cat that it was my responsibility to take charge and try to look after blind mummy and deaf mummy. I sauntered into the house and gave the birdy birdy a hard stare. IT pointed its beak at me, squarked and flew out of the house, with me in its wake! I returned home 10 minutes later after it had gone to find both blind and deaf mummy drinking coffee and Pixie still looking bemused trying to find the birdy birdy.

My Oscar told me that it is probably the same birdy birdy that got locked in his bathroom the other week. What with this, the 3 legged mouse we were chasing round the rug and the half eaten decomposing thing that I regurgitated on the rug, my bed and other mummy's bed, we are now not allowed in the upstairs bedrooms when blind mummy isn't in the house to supervise. I have started to copy my oscar and have taken to sleeping on the bathroom mat. Hope mummy will start to forget and allow us back onto my bed soon!

Saturday 3 May 2008

who said exercise was good for you?

Oh dear, poor blind mummy had a slight accident today! it is a very funny story. I know it is not nice to laugh at the misfortune of others, but really, she is a silly mummy!

Blind mummy goes to the gym on a regular basis and tends to try to keep fairly healthy, unlike blind drunk mummy who drinks and smokes too much and believes the best form of exercise is sleeping or walking to and from the fridge to get the chilled bottle of wine, or the cat food. That's more my kind of exercise too, sleeping is an art form you know!

Well, blind drunk mummy has some kind of interactive game thing that she plays on the television, something about weeing, but that is a little personal and I don't quite understand it. Well, I digress.

Today, blind drunk mummy bought an additional attachment for her weeing game which is to help her get and stay fit. She and blind mummy were learning how to use it in blind drunk mummy's house and blind mummy not blind drunk mummy for a change, managed to fall and hurt her ankle. She is now hobbling around on just one leg. If she was a cat, she would have three good legs and one bad leg which is much easier to hobble around on than just one silly human leg!

Well, that will teach her to slack of from the gym and pretend to get fit at home!

Sorry to those of you who have already commented on this post for the original error suggesting that it was blind durnk rather than blind mummy who had the accidnet!

Tuesday 29 April 2008

But I thought Biggles was a cat!!

I am extremely confused, (doesn't take much, I know). Blind mummy and Oscar's mummy (have been talking all weekend about their adventures as biggles at the weekend in the sky! I don't understand what they mean as I thought Biggles was my ginger penfriend cat from London. Now they are talking about having flown in the sky in a small plane like Biggles did! Did you fly Biggles, please help me to understand.


Here is a picture of the plane they said they flew in.
Doesn't look much like a cat to me!

Sunday 13 April 2008

more pictures

I have found some more lovely pictures of me and my sisters for you to enjoy.






The above picture is my sister Pixie, she is a flat pancake snake!













This is me checking myself out in the mirror to make sure I am pristine and groomed.



This is Lola looking a bit gormless


Finally, here is a picture of me guarding my computer to make sure that Lola and Pixie dopn't interfere with my blog.

I hope you like these new photos.

Monday 31 March 2008

celebrations

Hello to all my friends. I have been rather lax lately in updating on my blog for which I sincerely offer my apologies. I have simply been too tired and it has been so cold that I have just wanted to sleep.

I now have my lovely new shed to play on and like sitting to regard my domaine when it is not raining.

This week has been a week of celebrations. On Saturday mummy went to Manchester to celebrate Auntie Wales' birthday and they all had a lovely time. Tomorrow it is my sister Lola and Molly's birthday, they will be three. On Saturday this weekend it is mummy's birthday and it will be the fourth anniversary of my homecoming to live with mummy. Here is a picture of what i looked like back then.



I was so cute, wasn't I?

Saturday 16 February 2008

my valentine


I am so happy, I have a secret admirer! I have a valentine! I wonder who it might be.


Sunday 10 February 2008

disruption in my garden

There was a big upheaval in my garden yesterday. My shed was taken away! My grandparents, mummy and other mummy took it to pieces bit by bit and it went away in a big blue car. It was very noisy and disturbed my rest. I wanted to lie on the shed and sunbathe, but now it has gone!

There are lots of things in the house that shouldn't be there at the moment, mummy says that my new shed will be here in a couple of weeks though.

Monday 21 January 2008

the sky is crying



The sky has been crying all day again! Mummy came home early from work because all the trains had been cancelled. she had to get a bus from Bradford and it took her over two hours! It is she says, like the time I went to the vet to get my teeth done and she and other mummy drove for hours in the yellow thing with me in the back crying with a sore throat!




The beck flooded again this morningi and they are worried that it might flood again tonight. Maybe we will get evacuated like when it was the war!




Here are a couple of pictures of hwat it was like in June when it flooded.


Firstly, here is a picture of Plumpton Road where I go to get food sometimes.







Secondly, this is the road where other mummy lifes. As you can see, she couldn't get in or out!

Saturday 12 January 2008

confusion

Dear readers,
I am very sorry that I have not been able to blog recently. there is a very interesting reason why not. Mummy used to keep the computer in other mummy's bedroom, it was a big thing with a big keyboard and I knew how to use it. However, in the post Christmas sale, she put this computer in the garden! She said it was old broken and useless. In its place, she has bought a brand new smaller computer. I don't understand this machine, apparently it is something called a laptop and it is very technologically advanced and difficult to use! I have only just now plucked up the courage to use it.

Mummy says it is fantastic as it enables her to sit on the sofa and use the internet instead of locking herself away upstairs. This means that I can sit on the back of the sofa and look over her shoulder at what she is doing and then if she is not looking, take the opportunity to use it. Let's face it, she won't be looking often because she is blind so this could become a great advantage!

I hope you all had a good christmas and that my friends will come back to my blog soon.

Best wishes and happy new year

Paddy