This is a joint blog from Paddy-Gay-In-Der Vilj and Oscar’s Staff who are both very traumatised and are needing support.
This evening was quite eventful really. All was well until approximately . Oscar’s Staff had been to Marks and Spencers with Sensible Staff and Blind Mummy was at home enjoying her first day of annual leave. Oscar’s Staff went to Blind Mummy’s house and wrote some things and then went home to drink a bottle of nice pink fizzy wine. She got home and opened the door…
There was a squawk and a flutter so she closed the door and rang Blind Mummy for support. She went in the yellow thing with black and red stripes and collected BM from the road and they both returned to investigate the squawk and flutter incident. There was much knocking of knees, whimpering and hiding behind things. in the house there OS saw dead bird doing a headstand behind the basket of washing in the hall way. It was yuck. There were feathers scattered throughout the downstairs of the house, trails of dried bird poo and scatterings of purple blood over the floor, walls, curtains, sofa , table, kitchen cupboards, cushions, front door, cat flap and just above the ‘tv guide’ button on the Sky Remote. Denny was proud. Oscar was scared and still smelt of the canal and Molly hid under the washing basket.
Then began the clean up operation which rivalled that which followed the
This required the assistance of the nice bottle of pink fizzy wine from Marks and Spencer which, in case you were wondering, was a different colour from the purple bird blood. The hoover is now full of bird. The bird did not want to go into the Sainsburys orange bag. It seemed to still have a lot of feathers despite the fact that the whole ground floor looked like an explosion in a mattress factory.
It was really really really yuck. BM and OS had to watch Condle in the Wind on repeat to recover.It is now 00.23 and neither of them want to go to sleep and blame Alfred Hitchcock.
Oscar’s Staff, in the midst of the clean up operation, managed to break a pasta jar and cut a finger on her non broken crippled not when she was drunk arm. Whilst soaking the curtain, Blind Mummy managed to dismember the penguin shower curtain but at least she managed to make Oscar smell of Bilberry leave in hair conditioner rather than canal.
A very stressful day we think. We are asleep preparing for tomorrow.
Oscar, MollyMoo, Dennypoo, Paddy Ebeneezer, LolaBean and PixieChu